Simile Similah

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It’s a lot more fun writing a book than finishing it in some ways. For me the trip goes a bit like this. Gets bright idea for a novel. Furiously starts to scribble. Absolutely certain that this is IT. The ONE! It’s AWESOME, and it’s going straight to #1! Finishes book. Makes big announcement. Gets back to editing. Decides book is absolute adverb riddled, tell don’t show drivel. Cries. Starts fixing it. Laughs out loud, realising that it really is AWESOME. Finds more adverbs and a plot hole. No. It’s definitely a lump of coal. Cries. Repairs and rereads through tears. YES! It’s BRILLIANT! But no…. Ahem…

There’s just a week and a bit before my next book goes live, and I’m a very busy bunny making sure that there aren’t any dreaded lurgies still lurking in it. I have an unnatural fondness for adverbs, even though all the world says that they‘re devil things, and I also like a funny simile or two in a story, whether it’s supposed to be serious or not. On the fence about removing one of mine, I went looking around for others, and found these.

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” Steve Martin

“Delly lost her temper at Peeta over how he treated you. She got very squeaky. It was like someone stabbing a mouse with a fork repeatedly.” Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay

“The truth is like a nipple: the more you twist it, the more somebody is going to get hurt.” Jarod Kintz

“He had electric blue hair that had stuck around his head like tendrils of a startled octopus.” Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

“Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs, and then you had the urge to pass it on.” Terry Pratchett, Hogfather

So I reckon I’ll keep my funny little sentence just the way it is. While I was nosing about the internet, I found this hilarious list of similes from students. Number twelve is my favourite, “Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.” Now that really is a brilliant sentence.

Prunes

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34 thoughts on “Simile Similah

    Earth Angel said:
    December 13, 2014 at 10:50 am

    Wow I really see your process and intention behind your work! Congrats to you!
    wonderful to love the process, as many just like the finish line! Heart to Heart Robyn

    Like

    Jack Eason said:
    December 13, 2014 at 12:23 pm

    If we are any good Joe, we all go through what you have just described. It’s the nature of the beast. 🙂

    Like

    Charles Yallowitz said:
    December 13, 2014 at 2:56 pm

    Love that Pratchett quote.

    Ever think it’s strange how there are parts of human language that are considered ‘wrong’ if used ‘too much’ or depended on for a story. As if there are rules set in stone about this. I mean, adverbs exist just like any other word. If they make a story feel right to the author than that’s what it’s supposed to be. Maybe I look at the fun part of writing and reading too much to understand the taboos.

    Liked by 1 person

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:19 pm

      😀 I always make a point of checking out the books of writers who say adverbs are devil spawn, and so far I’ve found that they all have either a lot, or not enough to make a cool sentence. 😀

      Like

        Charles Yallowitz said:
        December 16, 2014 at 5:25 pm

        That doesn’t surprise me for some reason.

        Like

          jorobinson176 responded:
          December 16, 2014 at 5:36 pm

          When it comes to reviews and lectures, people in glass houses love to throw stones. It’s quite funny really.

          Like

    Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
    December 13, 2014 at 5:10 pm

    Reblogged this on Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life and commented:
    Jo Robinson on second guessing yourself when you have finished reading your completed novel for the 15th time.. I find word blindness sets in and after a while this makes sense. I cnduo’t bvleiee taht I culod aulaclty uesdtannrd waht I was rdnaieg. Unisg the icndeblire pweor of the hmuan mnid, aocdcrnig to rseecrah at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mttaer in waht oderr the lterets in a wrod are, the olny irpoamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rhgit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whoutit a pboerlm. Tihs is bucseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey ltteer by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Aaznmig, huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghhuot slelinpg was ipmorantt! See if yuor fdreins can raed tihs too. Do pop over and read Jo’s post and particular a few words from Terry Pratchett….I am sure that your book will be awesome Jo…

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:21 pm

      LOL! Thank you my lovely Sally – my eyeballs are bouncing a bit now. 😀 ❤

      Liked by 1 person

    danniehill said:
    December 13, 2014 at 5:17 pm

    I’m still laughing, but know some are worth keeping. I like to use the very occasional cliche but use it in a way it fits the scene. Can’t wait to read you new book, Jo!

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:22 pm

      Your subtle injected humour is brilliant Dannie, and yours are all worth keeping! 🙂 X

      Liked by 1 person

        danniehill said:
        December 16, 2014 at 5:32 pm

        I’ve just received my Christmas present from you, Jo. Thank you. (-;

        Like

          jorobinson176 responded:
          December 16, 2014 at 5:38 pm

          It’s a real pleasure Dannie – I really loved your book. 🙂

          Like

    danniehill said:
    December 13, 2014 at 5:23 pm

    BTW, Jo. My favorite is: 23, The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

    Like

    mikesteeden said:
    December 13, 2014 at 5:29 pm

    I have by chance of failure written several lines so very appalling they shame me. Two in particular have made me chuckle after the event. Sadly both are upon re-read far to rude to impart here and blight your blog!

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:23 pm

      You’re seriously tempting me to ask you to go with the blighting Mike – I love your satire. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

    christineplouvier said:
    December 13, 2014 at 5:32 pm

    Don’t let the “rules” get you down: http://wp.me/a30cCH-U0

    Like

    The Story Reading Ape said:
    December 13, 2014 at 6:05 pm

    I love similies, but I’m surprised that this one didn’t make it onto the list:
    “She entered with ungainly struggle like some huge awkward chicken, torn, squawking, out of its coop.” — The Adventure of the Three Gables, by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
    😀 😀 😀

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:25 pm

      😀 Sounds like me being pulled away from scribbling – very dangerous chicken! 😀

      Like

    The Story Reading Ape said:
    December 13, 2014 at 6:09 pm

    Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog….. An Author Promotions Enterprise! and commented:
    Don’t you just LOVE being authors? 😀 😀 😀

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:26 pm

      Thank you Chris! We do LOVE it – and we love YOU TOO! ❤ 😀

      Like

    Let's CUT the Crap! said:
    December 14, 2014 at 1:28 am

    Too hilarious. As far as second guessing goes, I haven’t heard of a cure for that. Has anyone? ^^’

    Like

    theowllady said:
    December 14, 2014 at 10:56 pm

    Reblogged this on theowlladyblog.

    Like

    olganm said:
    December 15, 2014 at 6:22 pm

    Fantastic! I think if we all followed all these rules we’d all write the same and the world (at least the written world) would be very boring. There is nothing better when re-reading your book when you come across a little gem you remember nothing about…:)

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:30 pm

      Seriously boring! I love reading serious books and then coming to a sentence where you just have to laugh. Writers are awesome – love them all! 😀

      Like

    Seumas Gallacher said:
    December 16, 2014 at 5:11 pm

    Hi, Jo..if you wanna throw a Guest Post my way to help get this one ‘out there’ I’d be glad to carry it.. my email is seumasgallacher@yahoo.com cheers, m’Lady :):):)

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      December 16, 2014 at 5:32 pm

      Thank you Seamas! I really appreciate it – I’ll get to writing it straight away. MWAH! 😀

      Like

    jjspina said:
    December 21, 2014 at 4:00 am

    Funny one – I laughed at the nose hair one! Cute! Enjoyed this post as I have all the others! Clever writer you are, my friend!

    Like

    peakperspective said:
    December 21, 2014 at 6:30 am

    This was a great giggle, Jo. I’m a big fan of clever wordsmiths.

    Like

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