Dayglo Uncooked Green Chilli Sauce – Condiment – Weaponised

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I’ve been meaning to share my chilli sauce recipe with you for a while, and now that I’m having my second miraculous straight day at my computer I’ll have at it. This is a very malleable and forgiving recipe – it’s also great fun. Just don’t fiddle around with your eyeballs for a bit afterwards.
Ingredients:
Apple Cider Vinegar (around 2 cups for this batch)
Juice of 2 fat lemons (or more – you can change with vinegar as per your own preference)
1 Whole head of garlic – peeled and chopped
2 Chopped medium onions
About a finger-length chopped Lemongrass (optional)
1 teaspoon Salt (or to taste)
4 to 5 Cups snipped green Chillies
You’ll need a blender for this recipe.
I suggest using empty, unwashed Vodka bottles for storage to begin with.
A funnel
Method:
1. Put the lemon juice, salt, half of the vinegar, the garlic, onions, and lemongrass in the blender.
2. Using scissors, snip the chillies straight into the blender – that way you don’t touch them too much.
3. Have a squiz at the liquid level.
4. Add more vinegar and/or extra lemon juice to top of chillies.
5. Blend until smooth, pulsating, glowing, and bubbling surreally.

Green Chilli Sauce

6. Pour two thirds of the way up in your alcoholic bottles using a funnel. If it overflows and lands on your toes – it will burn your toes – just saying.
7. Put a couple of tablespoons of yoghurt into a cup (for sticking your tongue into after the next step)
8. Pour some into a teaspoon and taste.
9. Stick your tongue in the cup of yoghurt, wipe your eyes and blow your nose.
10. Adjust seasoning or add liquid as desired.
11. Store in fridge – it just gets better. My two year old vintage is absolute mellow chilli gold.
12. Decant bits into cute and innocuous looking containers to gift to less favoured unsuspecting relatives (if you can stand to share). Tell them it’s a special mild piquant sauce that you made just for them. Put cute bows on them for emphasis on cute.

Bottle of Chilli Sauce with Bow Tie

This sauce can be as hot or as mild as you like. I generally make large batches – some all green and some all red, and then I fiddle with them over the next couple of weeks, mixing them with each other and adjusting the seasonings or adding more liquid. They’re generally hot as Hades for a couple of days when still fresh, but they mellow and develop character over time like the finest of wines. Keep them in the fridge. I like to make loads because they really are at their best six months to a year later – just give the bottles a little shake and a sniff (what sinus issues?) a couple of times a week.

Chillies Mozambique Bastardo

For this innocent looking batch, I used a mixture of Bullet, Jalapeno, New Mexico, and Mozabique Bastardos, so for my taste it’s pretty mild, although those little green Bastardos will blow the teeth out of your face if you eat them alone – I only added fifteen of them to this recipe.
The garlic and the onion form the base for the sauce, and create the flavour to enhance and make the bite all the more pleasurable. Don’t worry about this sauce going bad – there’s not many germs in the universe that could hang around in those bottles and live.
For those among you who are sissies (no insult intended – maybe😀 ) you can add a couple of chopped green peppers. This makes for a wonderfully mild sauce, with just a tiny kick. For those masters of heat though, feel free to lob in a Habanero or three, or Scotch Bonnet – but remember – the Ghost Chilli is pretty demonic, and can actually kill you you I think, so tread lightly with that one.

Raw Chillies

33 thoughts on “Dayglo Uncooked Green Chilli Sauce – Condiment – Weaponised

    williamchasterson said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:10 pm

    Reblogged this on William Chasterson.

    Liked by 1 person

    yeseventhistoowillpass said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:13 pm

    I know this sounds foolish but are people into chilies in South Africa. I haven’t a clue what an average meal is like.. Enlighten me:) i know it’s not wild fare but do people eat Mexican or Chinese or Thai…

    Liked by 1 person

      jorobinson176 responded:
      June 26, 2015 at 4:37 pm

      Oh yes! Chillies are very popular in the whole of Africa Juan – especially Mozambique where piri-piri prawns are cheap as chips. Quite a lot of people here are Food Network and BBC Food addicts – I mostly only watch American and British TV. There are some amazing restaurants and chefs around and about here so I reckon we’re pretty much similar to you guys. We totally love Mexican food – especially because of the gluten free perks for me, and Chinese, Thai and all the rest are go to takeaways – also Kentucky Fried Chicken, although I’m not a meat eater as such anymore. With all the colonial settlers bringing their recipes and food loves over the years, we’ve made them our own and “Africanised” them. Africa is a bit of a melting pot for foodies. I’ve got a couple of recipe books in the pipeline after a couple of years catering. Ina, Nigella, Gordon, Guy, Chopped, Iron Chef – all go to loves of mine. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

        yeseventhistoowillpass said:
        June 26, 2015 at 4:44 pm

        You are a world away yet just like us… It’s 7:44am on a Friday morning near breakfast there it’s late night snack time.. Amazing

        Like

    Sue Vincent said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    This looks absolutely wicked🙂 I may have to try…

    Liked by 1 person

      jorobinson176 responded:
      June 26, 2015 at 4:40 pm

      Go for it Sue! I got this basic recipe from a guy from India who was out on contract up in Zimbabwe, and it really is brilliant – you would do some perfect pics with your adventure too. 🙂

      Like

        Sue Vincent said:
        June 26, 2015 at 4:52 pm

        Given my son’s addiction to chilli, I think I may have to use him as the chief taster😉

        Like

    actonbooks said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:24 pm

    Thanks for this. I’m guessing this is still thin enough and pouring consistency after its sojourn in the back of the refrigerator — so how do you use it (apart from for degreasing stubbornly seized items of heavy machinery)? Do you put it on during the cooking process, or is it a side item. Meat, fish, cheese… the as-yet-unready world must know….

    Liked by 1 person

      jorobinson176 responded:
      June 26, 2015 at 4:44 pm

      The first couple of weeks you have to change it around – I use multiple bottles where I add either lemon juice or vinegar, and mix the different sauces with each other. Just like Tabasco, which is poured into wooden barrels to mature, this stuff morphs into special sauce – it needs to sit for a bit to settle. I’m a chilli fiend, so I have it with anything savoury – it’s also really nice in bowls for visitors to dip carrot sticks into – gives a whole new meaning to carrot sticks. 😀 Dribbled on to the cheese before you toast – oh my – yes. 🙂

      Like

    The Story Reading Ape said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:46 pm

    Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog and commented:
    Make this, have a tasting party and watch the expressions on your ex-friends faces😀

    Liked by 1 person

      jorobinson176 responded:
      June 26, 2015 at 4:49 pm

      Thanks for sharing furry! I actually have had it on banana slices – cross my heart – and it’s luvvly! Dare you to try it – and – well – maybe not —-😀😀😀

      Liked by 1 person

    Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:54 pm

    Looks delicious Jo and the photographs are super.. definitely some book cover material there! hugs

    Like

    Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:55 pm

    Reblogged this on Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life and commented:
    Hot chilli sauce from Jo – with some great photographs of the real stuff – can’t beat cook from scratch.

    Like

    philosophermouseofthehedge said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:57 pm

    Lure them in with the cute little bows, will you? Delightful stuff. Great suggestion of the unwashed Vodka bottles…and the caution about eyes – Wheweee!

    Like

    coldhandboyack said:
    June 26, 2015 at 4:58 pm

    I may have to try this one.

    Like

    Espirational said:
    June 26, 2015 at 5:12 pm

    So do you need a weapons permit to make this stuff? 😉

    Like

    atkokosplace said:
    June 26, 2015 at 5:55 pm

    A good chilli sauce is hard to find. Making it yourself you can really make to your liking. Awesome post. Thank you for sharing. Koko:)

    Like

    Sherry Carroll said:
    June 26, 2015 at 6:24 pm
    katherinealton said:
    June 26, 2015 at 7:41 pm

    Reblogged this on Katherine Alton and commented:
    Can’t wait till I have some peppers ready!

    Like

    olganm said:
    June 26, 2015 at 8:03 pm

    I love spicy sauces… Must get organised and give it a try. Thanks Jo!

    Like

    Let's CUT the Crap! said:
    June 26, 2015 at 8:10 pm

    I have to make this, especially since it lasts and ‘ages’ like a fine wine. Can’t wait and thanks for sharing.😀

    Like

    D. Wallace Peach said:
    June 26, 2015 at 8:42 pm

    Looks yummy. I like the little jar with the red bow as much as the vodka bottles full! What happened to all the vodka?

    Like

    noelleg44 said:
    June 26, 2015 at 9:01 pm

    Thanks for sharing and I’m a darned sissy!

    Like

    1EarthUnited said:
    June 26, 2015 at 10:20 pm

    Reblogged this on 1EarthUnited and commented:
    Mmmm chilli sauce, homemade stuff i can eat on a DAY-LEE! Nice recipe🙂

    Like

    Ronovan said:
    June 26, 2015 at 10:37 pm

    How about sending the actually chili sauce? Hmm? My address is…..

    Like

    Patrick Jones said:
    June 26, 2015 at 11:09 pm

    Wow! Hot Stuff!

    Like

    purpleslobinrecovery said:
    June 27, 2015 at 3:46 am

    Oh, my, gosh, “Don’t fiddle around with your eyeballs.” Hilarious! But necessary!😉

    Like

    Suzanne Joshi. said:
    June 28, 2015 at 6:54 am

    It sounds interesting. Thanks, Jo.🙂

    Like

    Colline said:
    June 28, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    I am thinking that a jar of this would make a wonderful gift.

    Like

    M T McGuire said:
    June 30, 2015 at 8:40 am

    Yum that sounds ace. I am going to have to try and make this. As a European I’m used to weights and measures so I haven’t a blind clue how much a cup is but I’m sure I can bodge something. Mwahahargh.

    Cheers

    MTM

    Like

    soireadthisbooktoday said:
    July 20, 2015 at 4:39 am

    Ohhh… Yummy!!!!

    Like

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