A Bit Behind – Again

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Last week I decided to detox – big time. Needless to say, as I always do, I zoomed straight on in with the big guns, and then felt like I was about to clock out from my stint on this mortal coil quite a few times. I really wasn’t expecting such a massive result, with aches and pains and headaches and all sorts of lovely things. I’m sticking with it for a couple of weeks at least anyway though, but at least I’m not (wo)man down any more. So I might be a bit late now and then, but that is my brand after all.

Late, Late, Late, White Rabbit

Food is a funny thing. It really is true that whatever you put into your body will have some sort of effect on you. Right now I’m feeling very slooshy about my body, and sorry for the poor thing in general. I’ve cut out sugar for the moment, and BOY does that stuff call you when you can’t eat it. I’ve been googling sugar substitutes, and I reckon I’ll be going with Xylitol for a bit, and dark chocolate instead of my usual Turkish Delights and Condensed Milk out of the tin with a spoon.

I thought I was a clever bunny, eating a bit of plain yoghurt for breakfast, healthy salads and so on for lunch, and then justifying my addiction to sweets and corn chips every afternoon with the fact that I don’t eat supper. Naah. Apparently I’m not as cool as I thought I was. So. I’m thinking that a bit of no junk food until these weird and uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms end is the way to go. It’s the scribbling’s fault.

Before I started parking my bum in front of my computer for most of my waking hours every day, I was really fit, and could easily see the muscly bits on my stomach. Well. Two years on, and I realise that I’m going to have to get off my tush for at least some time every day, and do some bouncing around. I don’t think that wanting to look good is a vanity – mostly – it really is all about health, although I don’t see anything wrong with looking the best that you can. Why not?

So fellow scribblers. Beware of lurking in your darkened pit for too long, while your backside flattens and widens at the same time in the image of your comfy writer’s chair. You already know that you are allowed to do pretty much anything under the “I’m a writer, and whatever I do is normal in my world” clause. Don’t bother with gyms and bikes and things. Step things up a little with proper writerly exercise. After every six hours in the chair, leap up, dash out of your front door, and run wildly around your yard (or the block depending on the size of your yard) windmilling your arms and chanting aloud the last paragraph you wrote. See what I’m doing here – still editing, but burning bum fat at the same time.

streaker

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31 thoughts on “A Bit Behind – Again

    M T McGuire said:
    May 20, 2014 at 1:59 pm

    If it helps, I have a huge spare tyre which nothing seems to lift. My bum looks like two bowling balls in a bag, pert and ting but my stomach… bleargh. Had a kid and it never went back. I can’t imagine ever seeing my six pack, actually I find it hard to imagine having one. I’m just hoping to lose enough weight to be able to tuck the wretched thing in.These days my knees are shot so exercise is a luxury which I’m really getting into. 😉 Ah for the days when I could skate and stuff. It’s getting better but I reckon it’s going to take at least a year before ground jelly tum zero.

    Good luck. I hope it goes well.

    Cheers

    MTM

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:38 am

      LOLOLOL! Pert and Ting – I’ve never heard of cheek names before – only you! 😀 Bellies are a pain to get rid of – although I have heard that if you use coconut oil to cook with or eat it as is (I’ve started doing it too – it’s a just close your eyes and swallow thing – blech! – although really lovely to cook with) that it raises your metabolism or something & burns away belly fat quicker. Skinnier or bust for me now – small paunch allowed at the end though – can’t give up everything forever. 😉

      Like

    First Night Design said:
    May 20, 2014 at 2:05 pm

    Condensed Milk out of the tin with a spoon? Snap! Not many of us about, I’ve found.

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:33 am

      Cool! We’re a secret society. 😉 I’ve met about four others so far.

      Like

      cicampbell2013 said:
      May 22, 2014 at 3:21 pm

      Love it! You’ve found another!

      Like

    Charles Yallowitz said:
    May 20, 2014 at 2:10 pm

    I’ve found the same thing. Even 30 minutes of biking seems to do nothing about the gut. Cut down snacks and added healthier stuff into the mix. Still nothing. The hard part is that I get sooooo hungry around the afternoon and it leads to a dinner binge. I don’t think that helps. Also, loving pizza, burgers, hot dogs, and other things doesn’t help.

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      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:32 am

      You’re quite fit though, and get about a lot with you little guy too, so a bit of a tummy is cool I’m sure. I also get the afternoon hunger that leads to binges – although it’s always chocolates and junk food – dinner’s better. Now I must have a pizza…… 🙂

      Like

        Charles Yallowitz said:
        May 21, 2014 at 10:35 am

        Not as fit as people think. I’m not going to list the issues. Though much of it probably stems from being a restless sleeper.

        Like

    Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
    May 20, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    I have never found a chair that I could not expand to fill! I started chewing gum again some months back – the kind that whitens your teeth and gives you the illlusion that you have chewed therefore you have eaten!! My teeth are whiter and I am not snacking as much – I am trying to find the variety that does all of that and exercises other parts of the anatomy as well as the jaw!

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:29 am

      Now that would be a wonderful thing! Is chewing gum good for you? I was going to buy some with artificial sweeteners to suck on, but if chewing’s good I’ll do that rather. 🙂 X

      Like

        Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
        May 21, 2014 at 7:12 am

        I use the orbit white – and have a piece after each meal and maybe a couple inbetween if I feel peckish – my teeth are definitely whiter and I don’t snack on biscuits as much. Don’t over do it though it can overuse the jaw muscles and they ache!!!! Either that or I am laughing too much….

        Like

    Green Embers said:
    May 20, 2014 at 2:22 pm

    Fighting food is such a battle *sigh*

    I actually read an article where they talked about how just going for a simple walk can actually help with your writing process, so good warning there.

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:28 am

      It really is hard, but I’m going to TRY really hard now to start loving beans and things. I like the thought of walking helping with the writing process, and that would sort out two issues at once. Just have to make sure I look where I’m going – clumsy oaf alert. 🙂

      Like

    ailsaabrahamwp said:
    May 20, 2014 at 3:32 pm

    *peers around furtively* condensed milk on a spoon? ooooooooooooooh yes. I would love to chew gum but can’t find one in France that is OK for people with a denture. Last time I tried I chewed for ten minutes then spent an hour picking the bits off my top plate!
    I walk. I have demanding hounds, so there is no alternative but the thought of “exercise” makes me want to lie down until that sick feeling goes away.
    I blame being very ill for over a year but as I’m now getting better I suppose I should own up and get cycling. Yes, I used to yomp 20 miles in full kit – boy I was slim in those days.

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:25 am

      Wow – 20 miles would take me out! I love your zooming around – I used to chase monkeys away from the weaver nests up in Zimbabwe, and that was brilliant exercise up and down hills, so maybe I just need to find something to chase again. 😀 If you put the condensed milk in the fridge a bit, you get to suck it like toffee – it’s wicked lovely. X 🙂

      Like

    olganm said:
    May 20, 2014 at 9:42 pm

    Great advice. I’ve left my job recently to do other things, including more of the writing. My job itself wasn’t particularly physical but I’m worried, although living by myself I try and avoid buying too many tempting things (if I don’t have them at home and have to go and get them at least it’s some exercise, isn’t it?). I enjoy exercising and now I try some of You Tube videos. So far I’ve survived to the ones I’ve tried, although sometimes I’m not that happy the morning after. I also wondered about a desk that I saw could be adjusted to use standing up…

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      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:19 am

      I love that You Tube idea Olga – brilliant! I’m going to search for some – do you think you could write standing up? I’m going with the exercise rather. 🙂

      Like

    Carol Balawyder said:
    May 20, 2014 at 11:45 pm

    Great advice, Jo, about not spending too much time on the chair and getting up every so often to exercise or do something.
    As for your sweet tooth I’ve always found that a few dates or fresh fruit tends to calm the craving. 🙂

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:17 am

      I’ve been eyeballing a gf date and chocolate bar for a couple of days now. 😀 The sugar craving seems to be getting better though, and after those withdrawal symptoms I’m a bit scared of it now – I’ll buy a bag of dates I reckon – love them too. 🙂

      Like

    WeaverGrace said:
    May 21, 2014 at 1:33 am

    I sympathize with your detoxing. I eat mostly organic, nutrient-dense whole foods. I’m off all cane sugar 100% and completely sympathize with the difficulty of getting, and staying, off. What a difference it makes! And how addicting it is! One little bit in a yeast bread, and I’m craving sugar as much as ever. The ONLY way I can stay away from it is to not have any in the house. I can do that now that I’m an empty nester, and my husband says, “good riddance” to it. We’re using stevia, honey, molasses, agave nectar, and coconut syrup in tiny amounts when needed. Limited amounts of fruit and root veggies help.

    I agree that looking good is a sign of good health.

    I have come across a couple remedies for Writer’s Bum:
    rig up a treadmill so you can use it while writing — my son-in-law did this for himself
    sit on the floor in yoga postures while writing — I don’t know if I’m doing the postures correctly, or if anyone actually taught me the ones that I do.

    I like your 6-hour recommendation 😉

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 21, 2014 at 6:08 am

      I’m definitely going to try out those – I’ve never heard of agave nectar – sounds yum. I never realised just how bad sugar is for you – do you plan on never touching it again ever? It was easy with the sweets and chips, because I can’t touch gluten and I don’t eat meat. Do you feel the difference to your person without sugar ever? Yoga is brilliant – LOL! Careful you don’t do yourself an injury with interesting postures. Must be cool to watch you do it. 😀

      Like

        WeaverGrace said:
        May 22, 2014 at 12:04 am

        Agave nectar is from a desert flower, and is the base of tequila. It is a lily that looks a bit like an aloe plant. Hmmmmm. I went looking for a link to reccomend to you, and searched on – agave nectar benefits. Bad stuff. Yuck. Forget it. Don’t even consider it. I trust Andrew Weil’s perspective most of the time. I’ll share some of my agave nectar with you. 🙂

        Yes, I plan on never touching sugar ever again. Except when I eat out, or it bumps into me on other occasions. I just realized that I ate out a couple times this month and probably got some inadvertant sugar (like in salad dressing), and it didn’t bother me! Hooray! I don’t miss it at all, except when I’m in the grocery store when I’m tired and hungry. Otherwise, the bakery aisle disgusts, nauseates, or elicits no response from me. Feeling tired and hungry are the times when sugar has the loudest voice, beckoning me to its refuge, like any trap.

        When my kids were growing up, they laughed at my husband and me when we said that some day, sugar will be considered as healthy as cigarettes. They eat very little sugar now, compared with other people in their social circles 🙂

        Yes, I feel a big difference without sugar. I didn’t get sugar highs — just the lows. It knocked me out, put me to sleep. Yes, I feel a lot better without it. I’m sleeping very well, too.

        Supporting hugs to you ❤

        Like

    Carole Parkes said:
    May 21, 2014 at 11:00 am

    All this healthy talk is making me feel guilty. Is it physically possible to find enough to eat using sugarless food? I’m prepared to try but do have a very sweet tooth.

    Like

    Sherri said:
    May 21, 2014 at 5:17 pm

    Oh Jo, I’ve been doing the same…since I started writing (seriously) I sit down far more than I ever used to and I am noticing it!! So I do try and get out for my daily walks and get very cranky when I can’t! I don’t want a jiggly, fat bum!!! But everything gets in the way of writing…grrrrrr……… 🙂 xoxoxoxoxoxxooxoxoxox

    Like

    cicampbell2013 said:
    May 22, 2014 at 3:45 pm

    Oh, detoxing is so not fun!
    Why, oh, why do we eat all the wrong things? Why, oh why do all the wrong things taste so good?
    I feel your pain, Jo. Xxx

    Like

    Sue Dreamwalker said:
    May 24, 2014 at 9:54 am

    I think we all go a bit nuts at some point as we take stock and try to remedy our waist lines.. I know mine is now refusing to stay in my size 12 as I battle the middle bulge of middle age spread!..
    After turning 60 at the beginning of this month… I decided upon my own new set of exercises.. ( I used to go to Zumba classes once a week ) So I though on with a fast up-beat records and I went for it… Great!… First morning… felt lovely.. Second Morning still great, so I pushed for another 15 mins.. 3rd morning! Ouch!!! the back of my thighs just told me to slow down a bit girl… and not so mad..
    Obviously the muscle tone is working.. But I also listen to my body!.. So now those high kicks are out! LOL 🙂

    Enjoy Your detox…
    And your weekend…
    Love Sue xoxox

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 27, 2014 at 1:46 pm

      I’ve been wondering what Zumba is – I reckon you’re doing great staying in shape, high kicks and all! I’ve let my exercise slide for a bit, but I’m getting back into it now, and I’m chuffed that my muscles haven’t totally forgotten what to do – although definitely a couple of creaks along the way. 😀 Have a wonderful week Sue – Hugs and Love. 🙂 XXXXXXX

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        Sue Dreamwalker said:
        May 27, 2014 at 3:45 pm

        🙂 Not so much of the high kicks, but just twisting away! … You can find lots of Zumba type classes on YouTube… Good luck with your own regime 🙂 and enjoy your week too Jo.. 🙂
        xxx

        Like

    Kev said:
    May 24, 2014 at 7:50 pm

    Lmao…Omg Jo! love the pic at the bottom…that’s what I’m like when I detox. roflmfao! 😀 😀 😀

    Like

    Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
    May 25, 2014 at 11:37 am

    Another award my friend to add to your other accolades – I know how busy you are but I hope it brings more readers to your wonderful site. The Influential Blogger award.

    Like

      jorobinson176 responded:
      May 27, 2014 at 11:27 am

      Thank you Sally! I think that there is nothing nicer than being noticed and cared for, so I LOVE it! HUGS! X

      Like

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